How Parents Can Help Stop Girls From Bullying

Girls bully their peers in a different way than boys. The bullying is much more subtle and does not take on the physical nature of the bullying that boys engage in. Their bullying takes the form of rumors, gossiping, exclusion and making fun of clothing or the looks of their peers. Because girls bully in a more subtle, covert way the bullying is harder to recognize. Adults are quick to step in when a physical altercation happens, but when the bullying isn’t as obvious it can be missed and go on for a long time and therefore become far more damaging to the victim.

Girls who bully are usually popular and charismatic. They are well known and usually are the ones that teachers, counselors and administrators would least expect. Because of this, they are also the leaders of social cliques. One important way to prevent bullying situations is to encourage social groups that are based on interests rather than popularity. Sports teams, dance groups, babysitting groups and other clubs and teams that are of interest to girls are the most effective. These groups will keep girls together who are doing an activity they enjoy and break up groups based solely on popularity.

Make sure that you tell your daughter that it’s important to be friends with girls who are nice to you rather than girls who are mean to you. This may seem obvious, but in the ultra cliquish middle school years sometimes being in the right group may seem more important than being with people who are nice to you. Girls are even willing to take abuse that deteriorates their self-esteem to be in the “right” group. Helping girls understand the concept of friendship is extremely important.

Encourage both bullies and victims to seek counseling Counseling has been shown to be effective for both bullies and victims. Bullies learn that friendship is not a way to control others and to take responsibility for their actions and victims learn that they are not alone, how to make positive friends and how to cope with bullying. If counseling is not available in your school, then parents need to make sure that the school makes this type of counseling available.

Girl bullying may not be as obvious as boy bullying, however it is often even more damaging. The psychological impact can be felt for years and many times can have tragic results. Make sure that you do everything possible to minimize the chances that your child becomes a victim and encourage your school to do the same.

Charlie Bentson King is a Vice President for Educational Training Videos. The world’s most comprehensive source for Educational Videos and DVDs. Including the web’s largest source of bullying video and DVD prevention programs.